on a beech tree rudely carved

oh damien hirst...when will you learn?

dude, be cool

about vincent gallo's the brown bunny:

I have been told, by people who probably should know, that the real penis double was a guy named Matt McAuley, who's the bass player in a band called ARE Weapons.

read the full article here
(via defamer)

as one of the few people who can count themselves as both an unashamed ARE Weapons fan and a slightly ashamed viewer of the brown bunny, this is pretty hilarious. i know weapons and bunny have sevigny written all over them, but still.

stop me if you think that you've heard this one before

ah! thank god other people agree with me about clap your hands say yeah's blandness...

however

cut copy is undeniably dope. check out the video for "future" here. i love the song, not sure how i feel about the video yet...

is she a femme fatale?

so work obligations/parties meant i missed both nyc long blondes shows last week - hear they were good though. finally got my copy of the "giddy stratospheres" 7" in the mail today, just hope it's better than the last 7" i got, which was elkland's "apart"....ok, fine, i love elkland.

and i'm not feeling clap your hands say yeah at all! take that pitchfork...

check out the video for the long blondes "appropriation by any other name"

it's go time, either i need to:

get a haircut

or

take to wearing hats

acting like life is a big commercial

saturday night at uncomun was pretty fun - marred only by the lack of functional vinyl turntables (thank god i had some CDs with me), my frail physical state, and having to take a friend home early so that he could throw up all over my floor. ok, that last bit was actually pretty awesome and we got some hilarious video footage of it.

here's a fairly accurate setlist from the night:

first set:
m.i.a. - fire fire
maximo park - apply some pressure
diamond nights - destination diamond
lcd soundsystem - yeah (pretentious mix) v. nevaris - your ways
my bloody valentine - soon (weatherall mix)
primal scream - shoot speed / kill light
lindstrom - there's a drink in my bedroom
geiger - cocain-e
fischerspooner - never win (mirwais alternate mix)
robyn - konichiwa bitches
faith boogie - lemme do my thang
lewis parker - shadows of autumn
david bowie - moonage daydream
george michael - faith v. missy elliot - get your freak on (erol alkan mix)
four tet - smile around the face
handsome boy modeling school - holy calamity
dj shadow - walkie talkie
dj shadow - the number song v. nevaris - your ways
interpol - evil v. dizzee rascal - stand up
fatlip - what's up fatlip?
the struggle squad - don't even worry about it

second set:

datarock - i used to dance with my daddy
the long blondes - giddy stratospheres
scissor sisters - comfortably numb (atoc dub) v. m.i.a. - bucky done gun
the rolling stones - 2000 man
lou reed - vicious
the slits - i heard it through the grapevine
panthers - thank me with your hands (mstrkrft mix)
yeah yeah yeahs - y control (tommie sunshine mix)
feist - inside and out (ewan pearson and al usher mix)
superpitcher - happiness (lawrence mix)

when i say "stupid" i mean "stupid fresh"

still sick

but

this mp3 of ted leo covering "since you've been gone" with a yeah yeah yeahs "maps" interlude is just enough to raise my spirits. and by "raise my spirits" i do, of course, mean dance around my apartment in my boxers

setlist from saturday night in a few

put your raygun to my head

tonightsthenighttonightsthenighttonightsthenighttonightsthenight....

come to galapagos for the following reasons:

1. to see me spin filthy, filthy tracks

2. to see how badly i can mangle a dj shadow song

3. to see if i can figure out the cd turntable setup there for the first time

4. to see if i have a fit of vertigo while dj'ing

5. to get the party started! woo! best spring break ever! woo! er....eh....

freak out in a moonage daydream

for whatever reason, i've been hesitant to follow everyone into praising deep cuts by the knife. my impression was always that it was kind of a flimsy electropop siobahn fahey or something. but, let's get serious. this shit is amazing. not only can i not get the melody for "you take my breath away" out of my skull, but the video has that great old timey futuristic feel. y'know, like in 1993 how people thought CGI modeling would eliminate the need for actors, etc. in this case, they were right

!

i just can't get you out of my head

the anticipation of seeing march of the penguins is killing me.

finally, one reviewer has the guts to say what i've been thinking for years:

A hypnotic combination of the comic and the sublime, Antarctica's Emperor penguins here look clownish one moment and almost preternaturally beautiful and graceful the next.

read the full review here

i think the last time i came across the phrase "preternaturally beautiful and graceful" was from a bystander at a shit hammered dance off at happy ending

people always ask me, "what's so fucking great about dancing?"

i think i'm going to start listening to !!! when i wake up every day. it only takes between 9 and 12 minutes, and it puts you in a sunny mood for the rest of the day

everybody cut
everybody cut
everybody cut loose.

from a story in the chicago sun times about rescued otter babies:

For now, though, Kiana lives alone, spending much of her time sleeping in a playpen lined with SpongeBob SquarePants sheets. Occasionally, Kiana will get a glimpse of the other otters through a clear plastic wall and call out to them in a high-pitched screech.

For trainers, the work is constant but the rewards great. Few other creatures rival the playful sea otter's natural cuteness, though their cuddliness ends with their sharp teeth and strong jaws.

read the full article here

i'm pretty excited for the home video show at mercury lounge on july 1st, i missed them when they were at piano's a couple months back. their citizen ep that came out on warp last year is fucking rad.

last night a dj saved my life

this is so amazing it makes me want to cry.

and i'm talking about his hat, not the music setup.

he's got colgate on his teeth and reebok classics on his feet

the guy that sells "quarter pound shrimp cakes!" outside my apartment in bushwick is a nice dude, but when i'm waddling off to work in 85 degree heat, shrimp cakes are the last thing i want to imagine eating

i know i've been kind of sleeping on it, but i've been feeling maximo park's a certain trigger a whole bunch recently. particularly the keyboard player's classy spastic moves in the videos.

come see me dj on saturday

for real.

all night disco party

good weekend. although i was kinda pissed at first, i think following doctor's advice and not drinking myself stupid more nights than not every week is a good change. now it means when i do end up drunk in a desperate search for generic brand doritos on delancey st at 4:30 am i can really appreciate it more.

great week coming up

the long blondes make their US debut at cake shop on thursday - super excited to see them, been all about the band since hearing "giddy stratospheres" in the middle of an erol alkan mix a while back. they're also playing at the fixed party on saturday, which will probably be the crazier of the two shows, but

uncomun is on saturday. y'all should come see me dj at galapagos. i'm considering giving some of my electro-pop standards a rest this week and trying out some new stuff. i'll probably end up just playing datarock over and over. let's get real.

i gave william burroughs' the place of dead roads another shot the other day. wasn't really feeling it when i first picked it up a couple of years ago, but it's fucking dope. even though it's one of his less polemically-hysteric works, it has a strange textbook/scholarly overtone to it that gives the sci fi sexual cowboy religious political crusader thriller narrative a nice creepiness.

i would go out tonight

beautiful day out, sick as hell.

March of the Penguins countdown: 4 days.

the perfect saturday morning song? quite possibly. (only available for download until monday!)

i'll drink to england this time

man, all it takes is one night of drinking 40s and making a fool of yourself...

casey spooner won't forget the dynamo.

and the internet won't either.

...!

this shit is so awesome! watch the trailer.

seriously.

life is meant to be awesome.

yes it is my coat, i'm a fancy boy

so funny it makes me jealous, from the review of interpol/pixies/lcd at jones beach posted on the always excellent fluxblog:

Very charming, yes, but neither of these people had anything on the group of three (presumably teenage or young college age) girls in matching white homemade "Not As Cool As Kim Deal" t-shirts who did girly bedroom dances for every single song in Interpol and the Pixies' sets. You know what kind of dances I'm talking about - it's all in the neck, shoulders, and arms, with frequent hair twirls and vaguely awkward (but cute!) hip movements. Their intense, unironic enthusiasm was so endearing; I wish that they would come to every show that I see.

went through extreme culture shock taking a cab from bushwick to the doctor on the UES this morning...can't remember the last time i was surrounded by so many put-together middle-aged white women with coach bags and capri pants.

put a straw under baby

pitchfork review for eno's another day on earth came out today, and while they dub it "a moving and fragile robotic lullaby" the LP only snags a 6.1

at least he didn't get a total smack in the mouth like louis xiv...

seriously though

how dope is XTRMNTR ? home sick from work today and listened to it for the first time in a while. yikes!

wear what you dig

this mix by codek's in flagranti makes me somewhat blind with jealousy. absolutely filthy. and check out the faint pink floyd guitar sample in the opening few minutes. uncalled for.

glitter canons, yo.

lazy summer day post...

short listed for the turner prize

too hot to think. drinking sparks (!) and not sleeping has left me feeble.

luckily

this video by the brakes is one of the coolest (read: cutest) things i've seen in a long time. i especially like the penguin that looks like he hasn't slept in days...

and, yeah, the misshapes blackout was kinda silly

i've seen her naked, twice!

art brut is the new fat joe.

jack your body

this dj mix is just plain silliness - an all out, i don't give a fuck old school electro mix. think i'm going to go home and dance around to it like in shaun of the dead...

or

the gas station next to the office just had a fire that activated the sprinklers. if you've never seen the "sprinklers" at a gas station, what happened was a complete flooding of the entire station with high-powered fire extinguishers that lasted for about 10 seconds, and created a gigantic cloud of dust/steam that went up about ten stories and made it impossible to see out of our windows on the 7th floor.

or

it's friday! sparks (!) !

and, yes, i really do want to buy the special edition of endtroducing

i'll always remember the dynamo!

ah skeet skeet skeet

check out the williamsburg salon photo gallery on fischerspooner.com, the dynamo is featured prominently for our aborted attempt to steal a cardboard cutout of casey spooner....

the kids still don't have a radio station to believe in

i really don't know if i can stand much more talk of how dope the M.I.A. shows were...since i wasn't able to get a ticket, i decided to stay in last night and listen to Arular while smoking Pall Malls and drinking Sparks (!)....so i'm not sweating it either

question of the day: can i really be that guy wearing a diesel-u-music pin to the diesel-u-music party tonight? have to say i'm excited to see out hud, regardless

how long before Vitalic starts being featured in iPod ads? or will the breakthrough be when "the past" is used in the next danny boyle movie? fer real, stop sleeping on it and pick up OK Cowboy - listening to it while riding the JMZ makes me feel like i'm in blade runner or something.

choking on cigarettes to get you along

the new ladytron video for "sugar" has dropped and it's sexy as hell. check it out

afterparty for Spoon tonight at lit, melody nelson et. al are hosting and britt daniels is taking a turn on the 1s and 2s. hopefully he'll play his filthy remix of "slow hands"...

step back and let the man dance!

i don't know if it's the sickly green color palette, the fact that erlend oye looks like he should have been on The Kids in the Hall, or that the song couldn't be more smooth....how much smoother could the song be? none. none more smooth...but i just can't get this out of my head.

i pity the doll collector

creepy? awesome? only you can decide....

people on ludes should not drive cars

good weekend. birthday party at the delancey friday night, then checked out Cut at bar eleven for the first time. of course i missed princess superstar, of course i almost knocked myself unconscious on the disco ball downstairs, of course junior sanchez was spinning (i don't know who's stalking who at this point), and of course it was awesome.

went to Misshapes on saturday for the killers/louis XIV afterparty - i should've known that something wasn't right when we showed up early for the open Sparks (!) bar, only to be presented with rolling rock instead....bitches....party was ok, brandon flowers showed up in a pretty dope white jacket, etc. etc. got real crowded and friends that came to meet up couldn't get in, so we rolled out early and closed down Lit. again.

i have to say that i was pretty impressed by the singer from louis XIV - when we were leaving misshapes he was waiting outside, not being let in. apparently nobody recognized him, but instead of pulling a "do you know who i am?! don't mess with the Roc!" he just patiently called his friends on his phone and waited for people to come out and get him...class act....

i'll come running to tie your shoes

been listening to "This" from the new Eno album, i think it's pretty rad - although that's not that surprising since Taking Tiger Mountain By Strategy hasn't left my CD player in the last five years... (thanks, Fluxblog)

or

just because it's friday.

we are the robots

caught the kraftwerk show at hammerstein last night and, despite being stuck behind a 6'3" dude in a cowboy hat all night, it was completely uncalled for. from the first notes of "man machine", the four aging germans proved once again that they are unparalleled in the realm of electronic music. even though i'm pretty sure they were all running soft synths, there was an undeniably organic feel to the musik for robots, especially when coupled with the decidedly analog-digital video projections. highlights of the night included "neon lights", "the model", "radioactivity", and "pocket calculator" (which was given a surprisingly pleasant 4 to the floor beat). i was really feeling recent single "aerodynamik", although i think most of the crowd was more into the older tracks. i know i might be in the minority on this one, but i found the appearance of robotic replacements for the band during one of the encore sets to be...um...predictable...overall though, a thoroughly ridiculous night.

check out onelouder's full review with pics

hypermediocrity....

just got myself a pair of tickets to see fischerspooner...on Last Call with Carson Daly...does that make me a terrible person? probably.

It's not my fault I have a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina!

Lindsay Lohan in a "minor" car crash while evading paparazzi...

Warriors, come out and plaaaaay

check out the new fischerspooner video for "never win"...i'm pretty excited that casey spooner is bringing back the Baseball Furies aesthetic in a big way.

Best Fleet Week Ever.

saturday night was pretty silly, the nolej crew threw down at Galapagos in wburg once again...have to say that nothing caps off a night like drinking a bottle of the finest - and cheapest - Shiraz in a diner at 5 am...here's my dj setlist, for better or for worse:

Early set:
Kelly Osbourne – "One Word (Favela Funk Mix)"
Franz Ferdinand – "Michael (Thomas Eriksen Mix)"
M.I.A. – "Sunshowers"
DJ Shadow – "100 Metre Dash" v. Snoop Dogg – "Drop It Like It's Hot"
Freeform Five – "Eeeeaaooww (Stanton Warriors Mix)"
Tiga – "Louder Than A Bomb"
The Rapture – "House of Jealous Lovers (Morgan Geist Version)"
Mylo – "Destroy Rock and Roll (Headman Dub)"
Chromeo – "Me and My Man (Whitey Mix)"
Audio Bullys – "Bang Bang (White Label Version)"
Alexander Technique presents Divison on Four – "Love Will Tear Us Apart"
Fischerspooner – "Just Let Go (Tommie Sunshine Mix)"
Mylo – "Drop The Pressure (Erol Alkan Edit)"
Apparat – "Funk is Something Else"

Second Set:
Bloc Party – "She's Hearing Voices"
Interpol – "C'mere"
The Smiths – "Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others"
M.I.A. - "Fire Fire"
LCD Soundsystem – "Daft Punk is Playing at My House (Soulwax Shibuya Mix)"
Annie – "Chewing Gum (Mylo Mix)"
The Rapture – "Sister Savious (Tiefschwarz Mix)"
Chicks on Speed – "We Don't Play Guitars (Tiefschwarz Mix)"
Chemical Brothers – "Galvanize"
Tiga – "Pleasure From The Bass"
Ladytron – "Evil (Ewan Pearson Mix)"
FPU – "Crockett's Theme (Zyntherius Lame Mix)"
Kate Bush – "Running Up That Hill"
Talking Heads – "Don't Worry About The Government"
Mocky feat. Jamie Lidell – "How Will I Know You"

Third Set:
Daft Punk – "Robot Rock (Soulwax Mix)"
Death From Above 1979 – "Romantic Rights"
Britney Spears – "Toxic"
Bloc Party - "Banquet (Phones Mix)"
Fischerspooner - "Emerge (Dave Clarke Mix)"
Goldfrapp – "Strict Machine (Benny Benassi Dub)"
Underworld – "Born Slippy (Darren Price Mix)"
Human League – "Sound of the Crowd (Trisco's PopClash Mix)"
Kraftwerk – "Aerodynamik (Alex Gopher / Etienne de Crecy Mix)"
Annie – "Heartbeat (Alan Braxe Mix)"
The Faint – "Let The Poison Spill (Tommie Sunshine Mix)"
LCD Soundsystem – "Yeah (Pretentious Mix)"
The French – "Porn Shoes"
The Smiths – "Bigmouth Strikes Again"
The Modern Lovers – "I Wanna Sleep In Your Arms"
The Modern Lovers – "Don't Let Our Youth Go To Waste"
The Modern Lovers – "Dance With Me"
The Modern Lovers – "Girlfren"
The Modern Lovers – "Road Runner #2"


rawk!